Give me a Reason
by SiriusBalisticPretzels
Summary: KandaxLenalee! T for a bit swearing. Kanda is pissed as usual. In a fit of rage he injures his hand. Can Lenalee help him with more than just his injury?  Sequel posted- Give me an Answer.


**Hello Fanfiction readers it has been awhile since I posted a real story. Hasn't been much time lately :P but anyways this is a KandaXLenalee pairing so if you don't like the pairing I suggest not reading the story, though perhaps it'll change your mind (Hey if it's happened to me, it can happen to you!) Anyways explanations and some stuff are at that bottom. I apologize ahead of time for any possible grammar errors (we all make mistakes right?)**

**I don't own -man.**

**HOPE YOU LIKE IT!**

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><p><span>.:Give me a Reason:.<span>

Kanda walked briskly down the halls to Komui's office. He brushed past finders and scientist with relative ease, as they made it their business to clear out of his way when they saw the irate exorcist approaching. He did not bother to stop when a tech floundered around, scattering a hefty stack of papers, once in his arms, all over the floor of the stone hallway. In fact, he walked right over them, wrinkling and ripping a few in his anger driven haste. He heard the tech whimper in, what was most likely, displeasure at Kanda's blatant disregard for his hard work. Said exorcist paid him no mind. He was almost to the chief's office when he had the displeasure of having a certain white haired moyashi step out in front of him, purposefully blocking his path.

"Che, out of the way, baka moyashi," Kanda growled in a dark tone.

"BaKanda, why don't you take a lesson in common courtesy and help someone when you practically knock them down?" Allen shot at Kanda, while motioning to the tech scurrying around on his hands and knees gathering the papers in a disorderly pile.

Kanda didn't spare the tech so much as a glance before attempting to step around Allen. However, the attempt got him nowhere as Allen stepped in his rerouted path with his arms crossed. "Help him," Allen said seriously.

"I'm not in the mood for your attitude. Now, move," he emphasized his point by grabbing the hilt of his blade. The cursed boy was grating on his last sliver of patience.

"You seem to be the one with the attitude, BaKanda."

"Che," Kanda looked to the wall to the right of him, catching a side glance of the tech, who had stopped gathering his papers to stared at the verbal battle between the two exorcists. This was getting annoying. "Out of the way," Kanda said shortly as he roughly shoved Allen's shoulder causing the teen to stumble to the side just enough for him to get by.

Kanda began walking forward again when someone pulled on his shoulder. He didn't need to turn around to know it was Allen. He shot the white haired teen a cold look over his shoulder for good measure. Allen stared back with an unflinching gaze, until Allen frowned and withdrew his hand. Kanda stared at the boy for a moment longer before continuing his path to the supervisor's office.

Kanda wasted no time throwing open the doors to Komui's office. The supervisor looked up from his current stack of work to Kanda. At the site of the Japanese youth, now standing before his desk, he sat a little taller in his chair. His usually cheery carefree expression replaced with a more sophisticated and reserved look, revealing nothing of his current thoughts.

"Welcome home, Kanda. I presume you came to give your verbal mission report," Komui affirmed lightly to which Kanda only responded with a sharp nod.

"I and my partner, Evan Swanson, were unsuccessful in our mission to Blois. The innocence, however, was intercepted by the Noah before we were able to reach our destination. The akuma population had increased far beyond the previous update given by the finders in the area, which led to more civilian casualities. When we arrived the villages bordering La Loire, they had been decimated and the water source poisoned by the blood of the akuma. We took the surviving finders and traveled to Tours and Orleans to catch for contamination. The pollution had not spread too far into the neighboring regions and we were able to acquire a purifying solution from the French branch's science division, which reversed the affects before too many more were affected. However, in a routine search we encountered another possible lead on an innocence piece and were deployed from Tours to Bordeaux where we crossed paths with the Noah, Lulubell. Evan engaged her in battle and was killed. She was called back to the Earl's base shortly after. With further investigation the innocence lead turned out to be a dead end." Kanda finished blandly. How he hated reiterating his pathetic failure on the simple mission. "Civilian casualties range around 160 to 200, finder casualties stand at 23, and the death of one exorcist. No innocence was retrieved and no new leads gained. The mission was a failure."

Komui sat back in his chair and rubbed the bridge of his nose in exhaustion before leaning forward and placing his elbows on the desk. "Are you alright, Kanda?"

"Death is common in war; it is necessary aspect if one hopes to succeed. One does not volunteer to participate without knowing the consequences it will bring. Bringing emotions into the field makes you vulnerable and endangers those around you. Such weakness is… _disgraceful_." Kanda answered in a clipped tone.

"Kanda-"

"I will have my written report in by the end of the day," with that Kanda turned and began to walk out. As he reached the door, it flew open.

"Brother I brought your coffee-Oh! Kanda, how are you? Did you just get back? Kanda….?" Lenalee voice trailed off as he brushed past her rather coldly. "Kanda!" She called after him. He didn't bother turning to look at her, just continued walking.

Eventually Lenalee's voice faded. He opened his door roughly and slammed it shut behind him, rattling the brittle wood. He looked around the dim plain room. His coal eyes rested on the taunting hourglass sitting on the aged wooden night table beside his bed. His eyes locked onto the new addition to the withered petals lying at the bottom.

His vision blurred in rage and frustration as he grabbed one of the gold pillars of the hourglass and hurled it at the stone wall on the opposite end of the room. His lips curled in momentary satisfaction as he watched the glass shatter and spread over the cold hard floor. His twisted smile morphed into a displeasured frown as the cursed glass reverted back to its original form, forever taunting him.

"Damn it," He snarled whirling around throwing his fist into the wall. He hissed in pain as his knuckles connected with the grainy stone. He drew his hand back watching the blood flow from the various gashes now decorating his knuckles. He ran his unblemished fingers gently over the torn flesh gauging the damage. He flinched slightly as he ran over his middle finger, the joint was dislocated. He took a deep breath in through his nose and popped it back in place.

"Fuck," he breathed as a flash of pain jolted through his injured hand. He slowly flexed his fingers out ignoring the flashes of discomfort. He stopped when his fingers reached halfway curling them back into a fist. He scoffed in displeasure and tentatively took his coat off and threw it on his bed to further his inspection without the damn fabric getting in the way. He walked to his closet and rummaged through it finding a rag to clean the blood off his hand. While in the process of cleaning his wound his door swung open revealing a winded Lenalee.

"Kanda, I'm sorry for not knocking, you just looked kind of out of it earlier and I wanted to make sure you were o…kay…." She trailed off for the second time since he'd seen her. Her eyes zeroed in on his hand and the bloody towel in his other hand. "You didn't have that when I saw you before," she said quickly never taking her eyes of the wound as she walked forward brushing away his hand tending to the cuts and taking it in her own petit pair. "Oh Kanda, what are you doing to yourself?" she asked quietly.

He looked at the top of her head for a moment before turning his gaze to the side and pulling his hand from her grasp. "I don't need your sympathy, woman."

Lenalee shot him a sharp look at his comment. "If I don't look after you, who will? You certainly aren't doing a fine job of it."

He turned back to her, his deep eyes burning into hers, "I can handle my own problems."

"Why won't you let me help you, Kanda? It hurts me when I see you suffering like this," she pleaded her hands clutching the front of her chest, wrinkling the pristine fabric under her tight grip.

Kanda's glare cooled to an impassive frown. "Che, annoying."

Lenalee cracked a small smile and slowly reached for his uninjured arm. She wrapped her fingers around his wrist and led him from the room down the deserted winding halls until they reached an old medic center now used mostly for storage of supplies and a spare cot or two. He would never admit it out loud to anyone, especially her, but he was thankful she didn't drag him down to the main health area where the head nurse would fret over and threaten him. He didn't have the energy to evade the strict nurse's overbearing regulations.

Kanda squinted slightly as his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting of the room. He followed Lenalee's shadowed form as she rummaged through crowded shelves of various cabinets. His eyes unconsciously followed her as she bent over to search a lower cabinet. He didn't think of the indecency of his actions as he watched the fabric of her skirt ride up higher on her thighs.

"Kanda?"

Said exorcist jerked his gaze from her legs to her face and she looked at him with her head cocked to the side. "Hn," he grunted looking forward.

Lenalee shrugged placing the medical supplies next to Kanda on the bed and dragged a chair from the corner in front of him. She sat before him with a gentle smile. "Let me see your hand," Kanda made no move to follow her command, "now, Kanda, I'm not joking!" She spoke firmly with an almost threatening undertone. He still didn't move. "Sometimes I think you do this just to drive people away", she commented offhandedly grabbing his hand and jerking him forward so she could rest it comfortably on her lap to get a good look at it.

"You're too reckless, Kanda," She breathed, while cleaning his hand of dried blood. Everything was quiet as he watched her work diligently at cleaning his cuts. "Komui told me a little about your mission," she said suddenly, not looking up to meet his piercing gaze. "It's not your fault you know."

"Che, never thought it was," he hissed as she pressed unnecessarily hard on the semi-open cut.

"Don't play games with me. Your macho-man act may work on everyone else like Lavi and Allen, but it doesn't work on me. I've been here with you since the beginning, so quit treating me like a stranger. I get it okay," she spoke hurriedly as she threw down the cleaning tools and pick up the cooling cream. "I get it if you don't like attachments, or people, whatever! It's just that…. That even if I'm not someone important to you, you are important to me." She declared boldly looking up from his cut right into his eyes.

Kanda held her bold gaze until her cheeks flushed red and she made a flustered expression as she looked down again to resume her previous task. She began to reach for the bandage wrap when he finally spoke. "Attachments hinder judgment. If one is to become unnecessarily involved with another it could skew their ability to make the proper decisions in the heat of battle, which could cost others their lives. Frivolous things such as want and desire are not important entities when it comes to winning a war." He looked at the top of her head watching her shoulder length hair and brush against her full cheeks.

"That's not true, at least not entirely. Love won't win us the war," she paused in wrapping his hand to look up at him again, "but it will help us through it." Kanda was at a loss. He didn't know how to respond to her remark. "I think that that is what got me this far. Without Komui I would have… I would have…..died." she finished softly. She finished wrapping his hand, tying it snugly and smoothing out the bandages before surrounding it with her own two hands. "Without Allen and Lavi and Reever, and everyone here at the Order, without them my existence would have faded from this life long ago. Without you, Kanda, I would not be sitting here right now having this conversation.

"It's like Allen says, we aren't just destroyers we can help people too. That's what I want to believe. So even if love and emotions make you weak on the battle field, they keep you standing tall when you're not. They keep you moving forward. They are your pillar, your support…. Your very existence." She smiled warmly as she looked at his hand between hers.

Kanda too looked at their hands as she spoke, digesting her words. "Well, I should probably get going," she said grinning sweetly, "brother is probably throwing a fit because I left in such a hurry." With that she stood and started to leave.

Kanda without thinking stood and grabbed her wrist pulling her, none too gently, into him. "K-Kanda?" she sputtered, her cheeks aflame due to their proximity.

"Take the responsibility then," he whispered harshly in her ear.

"Wha-what?" she was having trouble keeping her thoughts straight.

"You taught me a reason to live, now be my reason to live. Take responsibility."

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><p><strong>C'est la fin!<strong>

**So what did you think? **

**I'm considering writing a sequel to this maybe a little more in depth on the development of their relationship with a bit of Komui interference or something like that….So should I write one or leave it as is?**

**The places from the mission were in France and La Loire is a river.**

**I tried to keep them as in character as possible. Obviously I think Kanda got a bit OOC at the end, but really it's to be expected because it's romance and no matter how you look at it Kanda's character traits weren't made for romance…..all in all though if Kanda ever were to fall in love (kinda already happened with Alma in a way I guess) I think I did an okay job for showing his initial reaction to discovering his feelings. He doesn't seem to gun shy to me just a bit oblivious. Yeah and he talked abit more in some places then he probably normally would, but I took a bit of creative license to get my points across and I tried to keep the responses as frank as possible.**

**As for Lenalee I see her more as a I love everybody type thing. OH! And as for the whole Komui comment about how she would have died if some of you were like, whoa that's a little much, remember she was chained to a bed and when Komui finally came she was pretty much dead mentally so I think it's a fair assessment to say that if Komui never came she would have died. So yeah Lenalee is very much about family and bonds and things and I tried to paint as being a bit partial towards Kanda.**

**I apologize for my sad attempt at a depressing mission report. Also my stupid OC and Kanda's long period of talking (though it was a mission report soooooooo it kinda had to be long) I just needed Kanda to feel burdened I guess and he doesn't really care about the finders because they're "replaceable", but I think he would feel responsible for the death of an exorcist because they can't be easily replaced. I just needed to set a damper mood so yeah… I apologize cause I think it sucked a bit.**

**As for the pairing…. I'm more of a AllenXLenalee fan myself, but I really like Kanda and Lenalee together too, I think they make a good pair, like she's his better half (they complete each other).**

**So the inspiration for this story randomly came to me when I was changing the desktop background of my computer, which happened to be a KandaXLenalee fan art. It compelled me to write this story and I am very pleased with how it turned out! Hope you like it to, but I won't know how you feel unless you leave a review so….**

**Love it hate it flame it whatever floats your boat! Just REVIEW! Hahahah well till next time **


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